Tale of the Enigma
by SilverHaraki
Summary: Naruto Uzumaki was an Enigma. So open yet so closed off. Hatake Kakashi is set to unraveling this Enigma.   Warnings: Definite Yaoi : Crossdressing : OOCness : Possible OCs : Appearance Changes : Kakanaru is mentor/student maybe family later on
1. Prologue : Naughty Naughty

Full Summary: Naruto was an enigma, one minute he was peaceful and serene the next he was hyper like a three-year old baby, but then there are the times where he is shown broken and melancholic. And don't forget those murderous moments, those demonic blood-red eyes with no hint of mercy. Kakashi is set out of this mystery that is Naruto Uzumaki. The Jinchuurki of the Kyuubi no Yoko.

Warnings: OOC, Definite Yaoi, Cross-dressing

Disclaimer: Seriously people, I wouldn't be writing this I did own Naruto and if I did, Sakura would die and Sasuke would just have to watch some Itanaru loving!~

I don't own Naruto.

* * *

"I hope that you will be seen as a hero and not as the being you contain." - Yondaime

Mindless chatter was heard about everything and nothing of importance. Well to Naruto nothing important was spoken. Gossips, rumors, myths, accusations, what happened to the lady next door. All was useless to Naruto.

The door slid opened and stepped in the class instructors, Mizuki Ashisu(1) and Iruka Umino. Nonetheless, the chatter still continued on, none noticing the instructors' presence bar a few.

Iruka Umino smiled at the hopeful children, but the smile faltered at the thought of them not being able to become a Genin. He sighed, _some_ti_mes I wish they all could become Genin, but then slaughter would only result to those who wouldn't make it_. His gaze soon came to rest on one lone student sitting near the window. All the seats around the student were empty. Naruto Uzumaki. The Jinchuuriki. The container of the Kyuubi. Konoha's pariah.

Naruto was such an enigma, his gaze was never focused, always serene looking, airy, empty. It creeped many of the students, not to mention the rumors that surround him: the good-for-nothing demon that only deserved death. Resulting in total isolation and solitude, but Naruto seemed to be so content with it.

Naruto is the dead last of his class and the students always took the chance to rub it in his face, but it never did affect him. He always had that small smile, it looked so real yet so fake. Iruka never witnessed a true smile on his face, just that same fooling smile every single day he saw Naruto.

Shaking his heads from the thought, he missed the scorned look Mizuki gave to Naruto. Iruka walked to the desk up front and cleared his throat.

"Ahem, class," Iruka waited for them to settle down, but no evidence even hinted to the fact they heard him. Iruka started to get irritated as the minutes passed by, an ever-present tic slowly growing.

"SHUT UP YOU LITTLE SNOT-BOOGERS!" Iruka screamed with his specialty jutsu, Demon Head no Jutsu(2). The result was instant, as the class stopped their mindless blabble immediately. Iruka smiled (cough, bi-polar, cough) and started his speech on how they will finally take the Genin exam and see if they're qualified to become one.

Naruto tuned it all out and looked out the window.

"Angel, Angel what do you seek?" Naruto sang so softly no one except him could hear it.

**I seek the blood of an infant filled to the peek.** An almost-like-growl answered. Naruto only smiled a little larger.

"The towns will hunt, the Gods will roar."

**If they hunt, I will succeed getting more.** Naruto softly giggled at this.

"It's a sin, a treachery never forgotten."

**Already I am a soul rotten.**

"-to. Uzumaki Naruto!" Iruka's voice rang out breaking Naruto and the mysterious voice's collaboration.

Naruto stood up gently and almost glided towards the examination room.

"Alright Naruto you know the drill, hit at least five targets in the chest area out of eight first. With any weapon of your choosing," Iruka said with a clipboard ready to record.

Naruto nodded and took out senbons, and flicked his wrist. Five of the senbons hit the heart exactly while the three others hit the ribcage.

"Good, next you will have to try and score at least three hits on me with taijutsu," Iruka set out. Naruto nodded at this once again.

Iruka got into position and Naruto did too. Ten seconds later Naruto was the first to move. He first tried to score with a twirl kick and only ended up missing Iruka's abdomen. Iruka then punched to Naruto's right arm and almost succeeded when Naruto dodged and gently hit the arm. _One_, Iruka counted. _Two_, Iruka continued when Naruto kicked him in the shins, lightly again. _Three_, Iruka finished when Naruto rapped his knuckles against Iruka's forehead.

"Okay, you passed the taijutsu," Iruka announced and Naruto answered with a giggle.

"Now you will have to perform the Kawarimi jutsu, a Henge and make three or more Bunshin clones."

Naruto first started with a simple Henge as Iruka himself, no flaws in it. Then he performed the Kawarimi jutsu and replaced himself with a chair. And finally Naruto ended with four Bunshins, his worst Ninjutsu. Or so Iruka thinks.

Iruka wiped the sweat off his forehead after Naruto performed the Bunshin no Jutsu, hoping Naruto would succeed. He sighed; _I'm getting too old for this_, and grinned at Naruto.

"Congratulations! You passed the exams!" Iruka announced happily and Naruto clapped with Iruka giggling at the same. Iruka missed another look of scorn to Naruto from Mizuki, but Naruto certainly saw it, but showed no reaction towards it.

Naruto picked up a standard ninja headband with red cloth to match the kimono he was wearing. He was now considered an adult. After all, if you're old enough to kill, you're old enough to do anything else.

"Naruto can you please tell Sasuke-san to come to the examination room next?" Iruka requested. Naruto simply waved his hand and gave a kiss to Iruka's cheek. An action they both were used to and none were surprised by it. As Naruto did that to anyone who were nice to him. Including the Hokage.

Naruto entered the classroom with his headband hidden underneath his kimono sleeves and walked towards the crowd of girls. Already he could hear confessions and requests for dates. He somehow managed to get through the crowd and was now exactly in front of Sasuke Uchiha. Currently the last of the Uchiha to reside in Konoha as the other one, Itachi Uchiha ran off after killing the whole clan except for his little brother, Sasuke.

"Sorry to disturb Uchiha-san, but Iruka-sensei asked to me tell you it is your turn to be tested," Naruto politely delivered his message; he then turned around and headed towards his lone seat.

"Hn," Sasuke answered, though Naruto wasn't there to hear it. He got up and headed towards the door. All the while cheers and Kyas were trailing after him.

"Hmph! Dead-last didn't pass the Genin exams, I knew it! Loser!" Kiba loudly exclaimed and the rest just laughed at the supposed failure bar a few.

Naruto merely smiled his fake smile as he watched the world yet again.

"You'll always be an angel to me."

A rumble of deep chuckles responded.

* * *

**Later That Same Day…**

"Ha! Ha! Ha! You Anbu would never catch me! I'll deliver this to Orochimaru-sama and he'll make you pay for injuring me!" Mizuki boasted as he soared through the trees with even faster black blurs chasing after him.

A few seconds later, one of the black blurs slashed Mizuki's legs. Resulting in Mizuki falling and the huge scroll on his back to fall out, right into the Hokage's hands.

"Ashisu Mizuki, you are to be arrested and interrogated for stealing Konoha's Forbidden Scroll and admitting your allegiance to Orochimaru," the Hokage calmly said with a stone-face.

Mizuki only laughed and kept on talking about how his master will come to save him.

"Fool will only die in betrayal," a man clothed in black wearing a wolf mask said while reading an orange book.

A familiar figure was standing in the spot Mizuki was apprehended, his eyes full of betrayal.

"Why Mizuki?"

* * *

**TimeSkip ~ Next Day!**

Loud chatter was heard outside the door of Naruto's classroom. Excitement could practically be felt in the air and congratulations were given everywhere. Naruto hummed the tune he and his little friend sang yesterday and entered the room. Naruto calmly walked/glided up the stairs to his lone seat when Kiba stepped in front of him.

"What are you doing here? You failed the Genin exams! Or are you too stupid to even understand that you F-A-I-L-E-D!" Kiba mocked.

Iruka stepped just in time to hear Kiba's derision.

"Kiba, Naruto did pass the exams. He does have his ninja headband as proof," Iruka said.

"What? Where? I don't see it at all!" Kiba exclaimed while practically sniffing Naruto, a noticeable blush continued to grow on Kiba's cheek when he noticed how attractive Naruto was.

Naruto giggled and took out his headband out from under his kimono sleeve.

"It was under here Inuzuka-san the whole time," Naruto teased as he swung the headband back and fourth. He side-stepped Kiba and skipped merrily to his official seat.

Kiba blushed even more at the flirt he just received and slowly walked back to this seat in between Hinata and Shino. Akamaru barked at Kiba, embarrassed at his master's behavior.

"Troublesome dogs," Shikamaru yawned and glanced at Naruto, who surprisingly was not looking out the window, but looking at what seems to be Shino. Shikamaru simply lifted an eyebrow in confusion at this revelation. _Troublesome blondes_, Shikamaru thought.

"Alright first off everyone, congratulations on finally graduating Ninja Academy! I wish you great luck on your first mission and the many ones to come soon after! And now you will all be assigned as a three-man squad to a single Jounin instructor," Iruka announced and took out his trust clipboard.

"Team 1 same team, Team 2 consists of Lulu Lulufer, Fufu Fufufer, and RuRu Rurufer(3)…" Iruka trailed on and then finally came the much waited teams.

"Team 7 consists of Uchiha Sasuke," at this all the girl students immediately perked up, "Haruno Sakura-" Iruka was interrupted by a Shannaro and a take that Ino-Buta!, "And Uzumaki Naruto with Hatake Kakashi as their instructor." At the Sakura groaned and glared at Naruto while Sasuke just hned as always. _Those two will only hold me back_, Sasuke stated to himself.

Naruto clapped and smiled a slightly larger than usual smile when Naruto heard his instructor's name being called.

"Team 8 consists of Hyuuga Hinata, Aburame Shino and Inuzuka Kiba with Yuhi Kurenai as their instructor." Hinata blushed and stuttered a hope to work well with you both, Shino greeted them both with a hello and Kiba grinned at being paired up with his crush even if there was a third member to the team.

"Team 9 same team. Team 10 consists of Nara Shikamaru, Yamanaka Ino and Akimichi Chouji with Sarutobi Asuma as their instructor." Ino groaned, _great, I'm paired with a lazy-bum and a fat-ass_. Shikamaru just muttered a troublesome and Chouji continued to munch on his chips though he was happy on the inside for he was paired with his best friend.

"All teams please wait here for your instructors to come and pick you up," Iruka instructed and exited the room. Chatter quickly filled the silence.

Sakura and Sasuke walked towards the empty seats next to Naruto with Sasuke in the middle, Naruto on his left and Sakura on his right.

Naruto turned to his right and giggled.

"I hope to work well with you both. I think we will have a fun time together," Naruto greeted and leaned on his elbows with his face held up by the palms of his hands.

"Hn," Sasuke didn't even glance at either of his teammates.

"Just don't hold Sasuke and me back Naruto-baka!" Sakura cruelly replied while staring at Sasuke. You could practically see the hearts and sparkles around her.

Naruto merely smiled and stood up.

"Where are you going dobe?" Sasuke questioned Naruto.

"I'm going to get my lunch, and I suggest you to too. I have a feeling our sensei will be extra late. On purpose too," Naruto sang while skipping towards Shikamaru and Chouji.

"C'mon let's go!" Naruto eagerly said while dragging his two friends with him.

"You can come too Ino!" Naruto added in as he turned back to see if they were following him.

"Troublesome blondes," Shikamaru mumbled with a hint of a blush.

Chouji's face just reddened with a blush more noticeable than Shikamaru's.

"Troublesome, troublesome~" Naruto repeated after Shikamaru out of the classroom.

Ino just sweatdropped and followed after them, _well, mind as well try to get to know them. Who knows, they could be decent_.

* * *

**Outside the Classroom with the Kidnapper and Kidnapped!**

"So I made you guys your favorites as a congratulations gift! This is yours Chouji, Shika this is yours and Ino I made you one too, but I didn't know your favorites so I made food with low-calories since you said you were on a diet. I don't think you need one, you're too skinny enough." Naruto happily handed out the bentos to the designated person.

"Thanks Naru," Chouji cheerfully replied and greedily took Naruto's bento.

"I love your cooking! It's so good!" Chouji complimented, pausing after a few bites.

"Che, didn't need to do something so troublesome," Shikamaru remarked, but still took his bento. _I agree with Chouji though, Naru's cooking is so good. Better than that troublesome mom of mine_.

Ino was speechless, "Wow uhm, I don't what to say, but thank you."

Naruto giggled and handed the bento to Ino. He then took out an apple and a lollipop and started to nibble on the apple much like a chipmunk. (A/N: that's what I do with my apples -sighs- Such good juiciness)

_So cute!_ Ino squealed and took a bite of the eggroll.

Ino's eyes slowly started to sparkle with big chibi tears going down her cheeks.

"Sho…gewd!" Ino exclaimed and started to eat viciously.

"Slow down!" Naruto giggled and handed Ino a water bottle when she started to choke on the food.

"Wow Naruto! I can't believe you could cook like this! You have to teach me one day!" Ino demanded as she ate at a slower pace.

"Sometime, someday Ino-chan~ Someday, sometime," Naruto sang.

And so the quartet continued to eat their lunch with laughs and comments here and there.

* * *

**After Lunch**

All the teams' Jounin instructors came to pick them up, all except Team 7.

"Argh! Where the heck is our instructor! I swear, when he comes I will pummel him to Hell!" Sakura screamed and stomped her foot, with that ever popular tick that both she and Sasuke had.

"Hn," Sasuke's eyebrow twitched as he was irritated too at his instructor.

Naruto giggled and took out a chalkboard eraser. He then slightly opened the door and tucks it in between the opening.

"Pun-ish-ment~" Naruto wagged his finger at his other two teammates.

"Like that will work!" Sakura tried to bonk Naruto on his head, but she missed miserably.

Right at that moment their Jounin instructor opening the door and fell on the floor with a crater under him when the eraser hit his head.

"What the…" Sasuke muttered with wide eyes. Seemed Sakura likes to imitate others as she had the same wide eyes and looked at Naruto who giggled and clapped.

Naruto skipped over to his Sensei and sat on his back.

"Punishment! Punishment! Naughty, naughty Kaka-sensei!" Naruto sang as Kakashi tried to get up, but it seemed the eraser was somehow weighing him down.

_What the, what did he do?_ Kakashi wondered.

Naruto, seeming to decide his Sensei had enough of his punishment, simply kicked the eraser off of his Sensei and stood up.

"My first impression of you all, I hate you. Meet me at the roof," Kakashi announced with his infamous curved-eye smile and poofed away.

Sakura and Sasuke were once again speechless and silently started to walk towards the roof while Naruto skipped besides them humming an unfamiliar tune.

"I think our Sensei is going to love us!" Naruto sang right before he opened the door to the roof.

Said Sensei was lazily leaning on the railing and reading the bane of all women's existence. Icha Icha Paradise.

"Oooh~ Naughty Kaka-sensei! Reading a book like that in front of us little people!" Naruto accused.

"Maa, maa. As long as the other two don't know what I am reading, it's all good," Kakashi answered nonchalantly.

At this time, Sasuke and Sakura were seated while Naruto was sitting on the railing next to their Sensei.

"Mhm okay so let's start with our introductions. Name, likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams and specialties," Kakashi drawled.

"How about you start us off Sensei?" Naruto stated.

Kakashi sighed, "I'm Hatake Kakashi. I have no intention of tell you my likes and dislikes. Hobbies… I have dreams. Specialties… I guess Ninjutsu."

The S duo sweatdropped and their eyebrows twitched.

_So we only know his name and he's talented in Ninjutsu_.

"You pinky, go next." Kakashi pointed at Sakura.

Sakura huffed at the nickname, "My name is Haruno Sakura. My likes…" she stares at Sasuke, "My dislikes, Ino-Buta and Naruto-Baka! Hobbies…" she squeals while looking at Sasuke again, "Dreams…" her face turns red and she giggles a little insanely, "And specialties? Uhm, I only know the Academy Jutsus, but I'm told I have good chakra control."

_Great a fangirl, I should hand her to Anko to shake her up and let her catch up to the others_.

_Hn, useless_.

_Mo… Why does everybody got to hate?_

**You seriously asking that kit?**

Naruto pouted at this even more.

"Okay, you next emo-duck-butt." Sasuke's tic grew and twitched at the nickname.

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I have no likes. Many dislikes. Hobbies include training. Dreams… no my ambition is to kill a certain man. Specialties are Ninjutsu, especially in the fire element."

_Great, a slightly insane emo boy who's only ambition is to kill. Great, just great. I bet he thinks he's too good for the others too. Woe is me!_

_Kyaa! Too cool Sasuke-kun! Too cool!_

_You don't think it's…_

**Who else would it be kit?**

Naruto sighed for once.

"Next is you crossdresser." Naruto giggled at this implication.

"Okay minna-san! My name is Uzumaki Naruto. I have a lot of likes, but I especially like Ji-chan and Yu-chan. My dislikes are little to none, but some are hypocrites and animal-hunters. My hobbies are mostly my likes; some include gardening, training and cooking. My dream huh…" Naruto paused and his eyes glazed, "I guess to be accepted. My specialties would be a hi-mi-tsu."

_So Naruto would like his specialties kept as a secret, I have to ask Hokage-sama about this. But Iruka did say he had horrible chakra control, so maybe it's Taijutsu. Oh well, I'll see tomorrow during the test._

_Hn, they'll only get in my way._

_Oh my gosh! Did Sasuke just look at me? He did he did! _

"You guys have very unique personalities. I like that. So tomorrow we're going to begin our first mission, well after we begin training. Survival training."

"Survival training!" Naruto jumped up and down.

"Survival training? We trained plenty enough at the Academy Sensei," Sakura said, confused.

"No, no, you guys are mistaken. This is no normal training." And then he started to chuckle.

"What's so funny Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked, a little disturbed and nervous.

"Well you guys will certainly be surprised at this, the Genin exam you did before was just a fake. To keep the hopeless from with who actually have some chance of becoming an official ninja. Only nine graduate and become Genins out of the twenty-seven that pass. Those who failed will be sent back the Academy."

"What!" Sakura exclaimed and even Sasuke's eyes widened a bit.

"Whooo! Another fun year together then!" Naruto cheered.

"Shut up!" Sakura screamed at Naruto.

Naruto's eyes started to get all sparkly and chibi tears were starting to form.

"Waah! Kaka-sensei! Sakura's a big fat meanie!" Naruto cried while hugging his Sensei. Kakashi sweatdropped and patted Naruto's back.

"Maa, maa Naruto. I don't think she meant it," Kakashi reassured.

Naruto sniffed and nodded, but he didn't move from hugging Kakashi. Instead he turned around and stayed in between Kakashi's legs.

"Uhm, so anyways the training tomorrow will have a drop out of 66%. So tomorrow I will decide whether or not you guys are competent to be a Genin or should stay as little Academees. Okay, come to Training Ground 3 tomorrow at 5 AM with your ninja equipments. Oh and don't eat breakfast."

A _why?_ was heard from Sakura.

"You'll only throw it back up," Kakashi gravely warned.

Gasps were heard from Sakura and Sasuke's hands continued to shake.

"Throw it all up!" Naruto repeated hanging onto Kakashi by looping his arms around his neck.

"Okay well you're all dismissed!"

Sasuke started walking away with Sakura trailing after.

"Sayonara, Kaka-sensei! It was nice meeting you!" Naruto merrily said and then jumped off the roof.

"I have the weirdest team I bet," Kakashi muttered to himself, but then remembered Gai's team, "Never mind. The second weirdest team."

* * *

**At Night**

Here we are, past the moderately good homes and apartments into the slums of Konoha, where our mysterious hero resides in. In the apartment room 444(5). It seemed to be the most destroyed with red marks of Demon and Monster plastered on the door and what seemed to be a broken window.

A haunting tune was heard coming from apartment 444 though. A slow, wistful tune.

_"__**Mhm, you always did play so well on the cello Kit.**__"_

Naruto smiled a small true smile.

_"Thanks Kyuubi."_

_

* * *

_

(1) It seems Mizuki's last name was not heard so I made one up. It means Evil Essence, or at least it does to me…

(2) Again, it seems there's no official reason or jutsu when Iruka's head grows huge to scream at the little booger-heads.

(3)…Meh didn't want to think of names that I have no need to mention in the rest of this story.

(4) Sigh, sometimes I just wished I knew everything! But then my brain would explode… Can't find what Naruto's apartment number was so I made it into 444 as it is a common belief that 444 is an unlucky number because of it's pronunciation as death. Again if you do know his apartment number, please either put it in a review or Pm me please.

And that's a cut people! Good job everyone!

To those who are reading this, thank you actually reading through the whole chapter! It makes me feel all tingly inside! If you have questions about Naruto's appearance and all, don't worry it'll slowly be unveiled~ Kukuku… Ha!

I won't ask for you to review, you reading it is enough for me~ ^^

Thank you very much -bows-


	2. Chapter 1 : Green Eggs and Ham

Hello Everyone who is reading this! First of all I want to thank you all who actually read my fanfic and added me to their story alert, author alert, or favorited this story or even favorited me (I don't think favorited is a word though…)! It makes me smile with great glee -claps happily-.

Thank you all so much!

**Warnings:** Definite Yaoi : Mentions Crossdressing : Appearance Changes : OOCness : Shounen-Ai

**Heads Up:**Kakashi will not be paired up with Naruto. I repeat, Kakashi will not be paired up with Naruto. They will have a mentor/student relationship, and depending on how the story continues on, perhaps even a family relationship. But they will NOT be paired together romantically. I have nothing against the pairing though.

Also as much as I would love the bash Sakura, I don't think the bashing would suit the story. Though there will be some bashing, but not through the whole story.

**Disclaimers:** I do not own Naruto, if I did I would've kept Jiraiya that ol' dam pervert alive along with Itachi. And have Kisame changed into chibi form and be treated as a baby by Deidara and Sasori.

My updates will be slow and rare, sometimes I have the motivation, sometimes I don't. It's my story, don't tell me when to update or not. Make your own story if you want to control te updation. A satisfying story (at least to the author) takes enough time.

Oh and I forgot to put this put last chapter so here it is:

**Freaking Mortals and their cheese **= Kyuubi Talking to Naruto

_Freaking Mortals and their cheese _= Anyone's thoughts

"Freaking Mortals and their cheese." = Talking Aloud

Enjoy! -bows-

* * *

_"If I had any regrets... It would be that I won't see Naruto grow up." -Kushina Uzumaki_

**Konoha, Training Ground 28**

**Time: 5 freakin AM**

"Where is he?" Sakura loudly groaned as she fought off sleep.

Sasuke twitched and scowled at the useless girl in front of him.

Naruto was cooking breakfast over a handmade fireplace.

"I am Sam, Sam I am~ Do you like green eggs and ham?" Naruto asked to one as he cooked his eggs.

"What are you cooking for Naruto-baka! Don't you remember Kakashi-sensei said not to eat breakfast!" Sakura screamed at Naruto.

"Shut up woman! This morning is not getting any better with your loud-arse(1) yapping!" Sasuke snapped.

"S-S-S-Sasuke-kun," Sakura stuttered with hurt in her eyes.

"Shut up and let me sleep," Sasuke told her and closed his eyes.

Sakura, instead of shedding her tears, glared at Naruto, blaming him for Sasuke's outburst. All the while, Naruto simply continued his cooking and took out rice from a rice cooker that had popped out of nowhere.

Naruto, getting the hint Sasuke wanted silence, settled with the tune he had played last night.

**Hmph, stupid banshee, damn wrench.**

_Tsk, tsk Yu-chan! Haruno-san could be a lot worse! Like maybe her mom._

**She is as worse as her mom if you haven't noticed.**

_Oh yea. Ehehehe…_

Naruto started to eat his plate of rice and eggs made into a simple yet delicious omelet. Sasuke woke up from the aroma of Naruto's omelet and stared at the plate.

After a while Naruto noticed and cut the omelet in half.

"Do you want half of it Sasuke-san?" Naruto asked not waiting for an answer as he shoved a plate with half of his omelet towards Sasuke.

"Hn, thanks," Sasuke muttered with a slight blush and took the plate. He grabbed the spoon Naruto handed to him and took a bite.

"Good," Sasuke commented with wide eyes and started to eat more quickly.

Naruto giggled and nodded. He turned to Sakura and asked if she wanted some too.

"I'm on a diet if you haven't noticed Naruto-baka!" Sakura answered and showed off her underdeveloped figure.

Naruto merely sighed and continued to eat his half of the omelet.

**Ha! She needs more than a diet to actually improve her horrid looks!**

_Don't be mean!_

**But you agree. I live in your mind for Kami's sake!**

_Again, oh yea._

_

* * *

_

**Three hours later**

A poof of smoke appeared next to Naruto and it revealed their much waited Jounin instructor.

"Yo!" He happily greeted with a two-fingered salute.

"You're eff-ing late!" Sakura yelled and pointed a finger at him accusingly.

"Maa, maa, relax, no need for such crude language from a lady such as yourself."

Kakashi tried to relax Sakura.

**Bwa ha ha ha ha! Lady! More of a male! No that is too kind, an old hag is more like it! Ha ha ha ha!**

Naruto giggled at Kyuubi's amusement and faced his sensei.

"What's your excuse?"

"Well I was walking towards our meeting place when I happened to cross a black cat. Not wanting to get bad luck I took the long way here, when I saw an old turtle trying to cross the mountains, or at least trying to get to the start of it. So I did what any chivalrous men would do and helped the turtle reach the start. Then I noticed the time and simply Shunshined here."

"Liar! Who the heck would believe that kind of story?" Sakura yelled once again.

"Wow Kaka-sensei! You're so heroic! I bet all the other Jounin instructors want to be like you! And all the women want to date you!" Naruto looked at Kakashi with a face of admiration. Sakura face-planted at this and Sasuke almost, ALMOST did too.

"You are one of the stupidest boy I have ever met Naruto! I swear I don't know why Iruka-sensei passed you when you obviously can't even perform the simplest of jutsus! I bet you cheated or something like that. Mom was right, you're such a nuisance and a waste of a space!"

Naruto's look of admiration instantly disappeared and was replaced by a small smile. He backed up, turned around and disappeared into the forest.

"Sakura, Naruto is your teammate and you should treat him the same way you want him to be treated," Kakashi reprimanded with a serious glint in his eye. Sadly Sakura failed to notice this.

"Hmph! Naruto is much lower than me so why should I treat him the same way I want to be treated?" Sakura stubbornly snuffed and crossed her arms in a defiant way.

"I see then Sakura. Sakura look at me." Sakura looked up to see her Sensei and saw his eye curved in what seemed to be a smile on his face.

_I knew Kakashi-sensei would agree with me._

"Sakura you are one of the most useless fangirls I have ever met. And have I met many. Not to mention your outfit makes your flat chest stand out more and not in a good way. And the way you tarnish the Kunoichis in Konoha by wearing your headband as an accessory makes me want to gag. I know that if you were even released into a solo C-rank mission you will fail horribly and come back injured, begging for mercy. Frankly you're all just book smarts, you'll never survive in the ninja world," Kakashi coldly said.

Sakura's eyes started to shine with soon-to-be-shed tears and turned to look at Sasuke for some reassurements. She was only faced with a mutter of "I agree" from him.

_Is that true? Am I really that useless?_

_Perhaps this will finally give Sakura the motive to become a true Kunoichi._

_Why do I feel so mad at Sakura for making Naruto leave? No! I must push this emotion away! Emotions will only get in the way of me killing him._

_

* * *

_

**Inside the Forest with Naruto**

**Kit, don't take that so seriously. Her opinion is like an ant compared to the whole world.**

_I know Kyuubi, but for some reason I feel sad that Sakura thinks of me like that. I guess it's because I thought that because we are on the same team, we would become friends._

**Oh Kit. You have friends and once they start to get to know the real you, they'll stop at nothing to protect you and make you happy.**

_That seems so far away._

**It's certainly better than never coming at all, right?**

_Right._

Naruto continued to swing his legs as he sat on a high tree branch. Thinking with Kyuubi at his sudden confusion of emotions. It was so easy to discern his emotions. It was happy, sad, content or murderous, but this, this was so different. It was like someone grabbed his heart and started to twist it, mercilessly, but why is he feeling like this?

**You want acceptance.**

With Kyuubi's input, Naruto knew that was the reason why he was feeling this strange emotion. He wanted to be accepted for once in his team. To be a tight group of friends, one to defend each other, but with Sakura's prejudice ways rearing its ugly head, it seemed to be all hopeless.

**Nothing's every hopeless, there's always a small glint of hope everywhere.**

"Naruto~ Naruto~ Come out, come out from wherever you are!" Kakashi's voice rang through.

Naruto suddenly felt content, serene even, because he found the cause of his turmoil. He dropped a twig at Kakashi's head as an answer.

"There you are! Come on down!" Kakashi looked up and his eye widened at the height Naruto was at.

_How the heck did he go up so high? He shouldn't know tree-walking, much less be able to do it!_

Naruto shook his head as a no and lifted arms as a sign he wanted to be caught.

Kakashi sighed at his student's antics and opened his arms.

"I won't let you snap your neck! Jump down!"

Naruto smiled and jumped down. Kakashi braced himself for the sudden impact, but his eye yet again widened when he saw Naruto practically floating down into his arms.

_I swear my eye is going to burst one day if this keeps going on._

Naruto giggled and snuggled into his sensei's arms.

"Okay then, I'll have to discuss with you at what happened before, but at a later time. Right now we have a test to do," Kakashi warned and proceeded to carry Naruto because when he tried to put Naruto down, he whined and held on tighter.

Kakashi walked back into the clearing to witness Sakura mulling with her thoughts and Sasuke to what seems to be waiting for Naruto and his sensei to come.

"You're back," Sasuke stated.

Naruto let go of Kakashi's neck and hopped down out of his arms. He skipped towards Sasuke and sat next to him.

"Okay kiddies! The hold has been held long enough! It's time to start the test!" Kakashi happily announced and led them towards the middle of the clearing where three training posts stood. He then took out two bells tied together on a red string.

"Here's the deal. Each of you will have to get at least one bell each to past the test in one hour," Kakashi instructed.

"But there's only two of the bells and three of us," Sakura finally said.

"Exactly. Two of you will pass, while one of you will get kicked back to the Academy. None of you will even touch one of the bells without the intent to kill me."

"Oh and the one who doesn't have the bell will be tied up and be forced to watch the others eat."

Right on, Sakura's belly started to growl. She blushed and looked down to her suddenly interesting feet.

"Alright and start!" Kakashi commenced as he put the timer down.

They all disappeared into the trees around the clearing.

_Good. They all hid their chakra signature well._

Still, he could sense Sakura's chakra signature to his right, and Sasuke's in front of him. Strangely enough he couldn't find Naruto's chakra signature anywhere.

_Strange. At this level, Naruto shouldn't be able to even make his chakra signature faint with his large amount._

After ten minutes of standing and reading his favorite Icha Icha Paradise, the one where Isabella is caught having an affair behind her husband's back, one of Team 7's member got fed up and started to attack him.

A barrage of shurikens were thrown towards Kakashi, but were all for naught as they were simply deflected. Sasuke revealed himself and started to rapidly punch and kick him. All the while Kakashi was simply block him with one hand and continued on reading his book. Sasuke, eventually getting fed, started to do the handsigns for his more powerful jutsus.

_He shouldn't be able to do that!_

"Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique)!"

Kakashi then had to dodge a deadly blazing fireball that was heading towards him and for a split second, let his guard down.

Taking the chance, Sasuke reached to grab the bells, but only succeeded in touching one before being thrown back.

"Well, it seems I have to take out the big ammo."

Kakashi disappeared after putting his book away.

_Don't want my precious to burn or anything._

Sasuke tensed and waited for an attack to come.

_From the right? No the left. Wait! No! Above!_

Sasuke looked up and was too late to react when Kakashi said, "Maa where are you looking at Sasuke? Remember to always expect the unexpected!" and was pulled underground with only his head sticking out.

"Doton: Shinjū Zanshu no Jutsu (Earth Release: Double Suicide Decapitation Technique)!"

"Whew that was close! Ja ne Sasuke-kun~" Kakashi teased and disappeared to look for Sakura, his next victim -cough- he means target -cough- he means… yea victim.

* * *

**To Sakura who was watching the battle the whole time!**

_This just doesn't make sense, why would there be two bells between three persons. Unless! Unless he wanted us to pit against each other! That's it! Teamwork! He wants us to work together as a team!_

Sakura grinned at her revelation, proud and happy, and proceeded to look for one of her teammates. Preferably Naruto first so she can apologize.

"Mitsuketa~" Kakashi so lowly whispered as he spotted Sakura.

"Magen: Narakumi no Jutsu (Demonic Illusion: Hell Viewing Technique)."

Sakura as she was walking, was suddenly surrounded by a whirl of leaves.

_What the? Since when do leaves miraculously swirl around you? It must be a trick of Kakashi-sensei's._

"S-S-S-S-Sakura! H-h-h-help me!" Sakura turned around and shrieked at the mutilated figure of Sasuke's.

_Okay! Okay! Calm down Sakura! You just saw Sasuke barely twenty minutes ago! And Kakashi-sensei wouldn't be that cruel to his students! This must be a trick, an illusion. A. A. A Genjutsu!_

Sakura put her hands together, focused her chakra and loudly shouted a "Kai!" breaking the image of the fake Sasuke.

_Hmm. So she isn't just book smarts I guess. Still gots more to work though._

Kakashi seemingly melded in with the shadows and went off to find his final student. Naruto.

* * *

**Zoom to Naruto's Hiding Spot!**

"I could not, would not, in a house. I would not, could not, with a mouse. I would not eat them with a fox. I would not eat them in a box. I would not eat them here or there. I would not eat them anywhere. I would not eat green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam-I-am!" Naruto said to no one as he swung his legs in the cold lake.

"Kaka-sensei, do you like green eggs and ham?" Naruto questioned when Kakashi appeared right behind him.

"Saa, I don't even think there is such a thing as green eggs and ham."

"Nope! There is such a thing! And I must say it's very good!"

"I see," Kakashi drawled and quickly threw shurikens at Naruto. Naruto dodged before they were even close to hitting him.

"You're a big meanie Kaka-sensei," Naruto's voice echoed around Kakashi.

"Why don't you stop hiding and come out now Naruto!"

"Why Sensei? You don't seem that fun to play with right now. Big meanies need punishment. Punishment for big meanies," Naruto's voice questioned, his voice taking on a haunting tone.

"Punishment, punishment, punishment," was echoed continuously around Kakashi.

_Shiet! How the heck is Naruto doing this!_

**Kit, relax.**

_Hee hee hee hee._

"Neh Kaka-sensei, were you such a big meanie to Obito?" Naruto suddenly appeared in front of said sensei, but his face was far from the usual childish, only a cruel amused face.

Kakashi's eye widened. _How does he know Obito?_

Kakashi had no time to react when Naruto suddenly kicked him in the abdomen with several senbons thrown into his left thigh. Then as Kakashi tried to gain his breath, Naruto performed a Ninjutsu Kakashi didn't even think he would even know of. But Kakashi wouldn't what the jutsu was until after it was thrown because it was done with no handsigns and words. An amazing triumph really.

_Suiton: Suiryūdan no Jutsu (Water Release: Water Dragon Bullet Technique)_

It hit Kakashi straight on and Kakashi was put down to his knees by it.

_I must be losing my touch, my arrogance was the key to my downfall ey? I have to start training again, no more slacking off. But that still doesn't explain why Naruto is so powerful all of a sudden, he shouldn't be able to even lay a hit on me with what the Academy records had said about him. And what's with the sudden mood change, it's so…evil, tainted, murderous…_

"I don't like big meanies. Big meanies only hurt. Big meanies only hurt Naruto." Naruto's face was shadowed by his long bangs, obscuring his eyes.

_What is happening to him?_

**Naruto, calm down! Calm the fudge down! You don't' want to kill someone you like again do you?**

And just as quickly as it came, Naruto was back to his childish demeanor. He faced his sensei and saw the mess he was in.

"Kaka-sensei! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you on purpose, but it's just you made me remember. You made me remember," Naruto apologized as he hugged his sensei.

"Maa, maa Naruto it's okay. I've dealt with worse okay?" Kakashi reassured.

Naruto nodded with a sniff and to Kakashi's surprise, started to heal him.

_Wha… He shouldn't be able to have such a strong control over chakra at this age! Again, he shouldn't even have the knowledge of it! I have to get to the bottom of this!_

"Naruto is really sorry, Naruto really is," Naruto once again apologized.

"It's all in the past right Naruto, just forget about it alright?"

"How come you don't forget it then Sensei?" Naruto questioned with a hint of curiosity mixed in.

"Wha-" Kakashi was interrupted by the timer ringing.

"Time's up!" Kakashi happily announced with his infamous curved eye smile. He waited until both Sakura and Sasuke arrived to the clearing.

While Naruto had his moment with Kakashi (not like that people!), Sakura went to Sasuke and helped him out of his predicament. They thought of a plan together to be able to get the bells but before they could actually commence it, the bell had rung. They both were disappointed and depressed that they would have to go back to the Academy.

"Now since none of you got a bell-"

"Wrong Sensei, we did get some bells," Naruto's serene voice interrupted and held up two very familiar looking bells. He tossed the two to Sakura and Sasuke with a shrug.

"I don't need to be an official ninja to be a ninja," Naruto confusingly said.

"Sensei you have to let us pass. Me and Sasuke figured out the true purpose of this test and it was to either pit us against each other or work together. Depending on the choice you would either fail or pass us," Sakura, for once using her smarts, said with a determined pair of eyes.

"Alright you guys… pass!" Confetti and smoke came up behind Kakashi.

Sakura cheered, Sasuke merely smiled, and Naruto well he started to jump around and scream "Pass!" very loudly.

_Naruto is like a paintbrush, red then blue, then red again and finally orange. _Kakashi mused with a soft pair of eyes (or eye, lol…).

"Alright come tomorrow at 5 AM for your first mission! Kakashi out!" With that Kakashi disappeared in a poof of smoke.

"See ya," Sasuke muttered and walked to his house. Naruto waved and was about to go to the Hokage Tower when Sakura stopped him.

"Wait Naruto! Uhm I just wanted to apologize for being such a betch to you. I guess I was so jealous because I mean your so pretty even though your not a girl and uhm I guess my mom's antics passed on to me." Sakura blushed and started to play with the hems of her red qipao dress. Too scared to look up at Naruto.

Naruto sighed and smiled fondly at Sakura, feeling so much older than he should feel. He walked towards his teammate and lifted her face up with his fingers under her chin.

"Sakura, I forgive. I think it's really sweet that you think of me as pretty," at this Naruto winked at her, "And I just hope that you would put your previous view of me in the past and start anew. All I ask for is to be friends with you."

Sakura's eyes widened at the last sentence Naruto said. She started to tear up for the second time that day and hugged Naruto's slightly smaller frame, her tears soaking the shoulder of his white kimono.

"I-I-I-I would like to be f-f-friends Naruto-kun," Sakura muttered with that dreaded blush appearing on her face again. After a few moments Sakura got her act together and apologized for wetting his kimono.

"It's okay Silly Sakura, it won't be permanent," Naruto giggled, his usual childish personality showing up.

**Told ya Kit. Just needed time. Though this happened sooner then I would have expected.**

_Fate has us in her hands Yu-chan. We are in Fate's hands._

**Unfortunately.**

"Well Silly Sakura! I have to go visit Ji-chan in the Ji-chan's Tower before Kaka-sensei says his most glorious comments about us! Bye bye!" Naruto kissed Sakura's cheek and jumped away to the Hokage Tower. Sakura smiled, place a hand to the cheek Naruto kissed and walked back home thinking how crazy this one day has been. _And it's been only the first day together as a team. Not as an official team too. Wow, the future will be chaotic. I pray to Kami-sama I'll survive with all my body parts intact._

_

* * *

_

**Hokage Tower AKA Ji-chan's Tower**

"Ah since everybody is gathered here, let's get the reports goi-" the Sandaime was interrupted by a distant "Ji-chan!" getting louder by the second.

The door to the Hokage's door was slammed open, making all the Jounin instructors get into their attack position all except the Anbu, Hokage and Kakashi, who all were used to this (whether they wanted to or not).

The culprit for the Jounins' current positions didn't even spare a glance at the others and jumped into the Hokage lap with a big wet kiss to the strongest ninja of the village. Right smack on the cheek.

"I hope I'm not late Ji-chan!"

"Nope, you're right on time Naruto," 'Ji-chan' fondly answered with a soft smile.

"Okay continuing on, can I have the reports on the tea-"

"Surely you don't want us to discuss in front of _him_," one of the Jounin instructors rudely interrupted while scowling at Naruto.

**If I ever get out of this cage I will rip him up along with the others. I remember him, Hirashi I think? Yeah, Hirashi is going to die along with those in the Those Who Are Promised The Most Painful Death list. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.**

Naruto giggled, startling the Jounin.

"Naruto is one of my most trusted confidant, I put more trust in him than any of you, especially you Hirashi," the Hokage coldly answered, annoyed at being interrupted again. Hirashi was about to answer but stopped himself when he saw the Hokage's icy glare directed at him. He saw that glare multiple times. It was shown to criminals before they were sent to the T & I Department, they had no hint of mercy in them.

"As I was rudely interrupted before," cue glare at Hirashi, "I'll like to have the reports on each of your teams starting with Team 1."

The Jounin for Team 1 stepped out, ironically it was Hirashi.

"Team 1 failed."

**Obviously, you're not even competent to get your own team, much less lead one! Stupid imbecile!**

Naruto smiled at the insult.

_I agree very much Yu-chan._

"Team 2 failed."

And so it continued in a long line of failures until it was Kakashi's turn.

"Team 7 passed with flying colors."

"Colors can't fly Sensei. Well only colors can fly if they're Pixies," Naruto piped in. Ignoring the incredulous looks from the others.

Kakashi simply curved his eyes and continued on.

"Uchiha Sasuke is above average then most Genins, but he still needs some work here and there especially on his arrogance. Haruno Sakura on the other hand has potential to be above average, but her fangirlism has gotten in the way and hindered it. She had an encounter with Reality and shown promise during the test to becoming either a great medic, or Genjutsu user. I hope you don't mind if I push her towards either you Kurenai or Anko for that matter."

"I don't mind at all, I would like to show this Haruno-san what it is to be a true Kunoichi," a rather pretty brunette replied. Her shocking red eyes meeting Kakashi's. Kakashi nodded thanks, inwardly dreading the day to ask Anko. _I pray to Kami-sama to grant me protection on not getting raped._

"Naruto is a whole other matter altogether."

Naruto smiled at this, going into his serene mood.

"Naruto's records from the Academy totally contradicts what I've witness and first-handedly felt. He shows exceptional control over his chakra, performing a high-ranked jutsu and actually healed the injuries he gave me. Not to mention his taijutsu is fairly good, though it is a style I have never seen."

All the Jounins' eyes widened at this and looked at Naruto, as if that would show how he would be able to do such a thing, much less impress Kakashi! This is Kakashi we are talking about! The cool as a cucumber (what the fudge does that mean? I never did get this) Kakashi!

"Hokage-sama! We must retain the Jinchuuriki! He's getting more powerful; soon he'll release the Kyuubi and exalt revenge against us!" Hirashi once again foolishly said and threw a kunai at Naruto, who was still sitting in the Hokage's lap.

The Anbus situated around the four corners of the room stopped the kunai from reaching its target and apprehended Hirashi.

"Hirashi Nagara, you are sentence to immediate execution for attacking the Hokage."

"I wasn't trying to the Hokage! I was protecting him by attacking the demon!" Hirashi screamed, his eyes showing his pure hate for the _demon_ as he liked to call Naruto.

"Silence."

And one of the Anbus beheaded Hirashi with a simple swing of a katana. The Jounins watched unblinking, knowing he deserved such a death. He was a horrible Jounin too, and his loyalties wavered most frequently.

Naruto watched with that same fake smile.

_May his soul rest in peace._

**Bullshiet Kit. You mean may his soul live in Hell.**

_Kyuubi…_

**If you can't hate them I will hate them for both you and me.**

"Moving on, Kakashi you will stay after the meeting to discuss between Naruto, yourself and I about his abilities."

"Team 8 please," the Hokage requested.

Kurenai nodded and stepped up.

"Team 8 has passed, but barely. With the thanks to Hinata as she figured out the true meaning of the test. Kiba showed his arrogance and tried to face me one on one and failed. Shino, knowing he would not be able to defeat me, helped Hinata and because of those two, Kiba had passed. Hinata though needs work on her confidence, Kiba on his arrogance like the Uchiha and Shino on his interacting skills."

"I suggest Ibiki for Hinata Kurenai-san," Naruto's soft voice broke the silence.

"What?" Kurenai's eyes were wide. Surely he didn't THE Ibiki Morino. The commanding officer of the Konoha Anbu Torture and Interrogation Force. Said to be the most sadistic ninja of all Konoha ninjas, topping even Anko (hehe..)

"Rumors are just rumors. Ibiki though cruel to his captives, would never hurt a fellow ninja. I'm sure he'll boost Hinata's confidence and add some tricks up her sleeves too."

"Interesting, I'll ask Ibiki about this," Kurenai answered and started to think about the pros and cons if she handed Hinata to Ibiki.

"Team 9 failed."

."Team 10 passed. Ino, like Sakura, has to abandon her fangirl ways, although not as severe as most girls, it is still a problem. She shows promise in using her family's jutsus and with a big push, she could become one of the best of her clan. Shikamaru has a remarkable mind, his strategies were what made them pass as they had to work together, only problem is he is a lazy bum and has to get motivation to actually move and fight. Chouji will have to work more on his clan's jutsus and focus more on filling his body with more meat than just junk. His shyness is will have to be worked on too."

The Sandaime nodded and dismissed everyone except for Kakashi.

"It seems we finally have a full house of Genins huh," the Sandaime softly voiced out with a wide smile.

"This group will sure be a whole lot to handle," Kakashi happily said. And then turned serious when he remembered the reason for staying.

"So can you explain to me of Naruto's skills?"

The Sandaime was about to answer when Naruto stopped him by lifting a hand up. Both men saw Naruto perform the necessary seals for privacy and silencing jutsus.

"How do you even know how to do that!"

Kakashi started muttering and paced back and fourth.

Naruto giggled, breaking Kakashi out of his moment.

"Explain. Now." Kakashi sat down on the chair and stared at the duo.

Naruto sighed and got off of the Sandaime's laps.

The Sandaime sighed, as much as Naruto was light, he was getting old, and the days were not making him any stronger.

"I have always known about the Kyuubi, ever since I could remember. We're friends even, well more like family. Don't worry, the Kyuubi isn't such a malicious being as we're all to believe," Naruto added when Kakashi was about to retaliate when he mentioned his relationship with the Kyuubi.

"I started training since the day I turned five because of my early meeting with the Kyuubi. He said that I was unusually intelligent for a human. I shouldn't be able to even understand him, much less speak a civilized conversation with him. But he took it as an opportunity and started to train me in everything he could think of. I'm still learning now too. And though I would be thought as above the average Genin, I would be ranked Jounin at best. Also I have an affinity to wind, most likely from my father, hence the 'floating' when I jumped off the branch. That's all I am telling Sensei, I don't trust you that much. Even the Sandaime doesn't know the true extent of my abilities and he's one of my most trusted people."

To say that Kakashi was speechless is like saying Gai's teeth were yellow or that Tsunade was the most luckiest gambler in the world. A thump occurred and a concerned "Sensei?" was heard.

**Say! I like green eggs and ham! I do! I like them, Sam I am!**

_Ha ha ha!_

* * *

(1) So when they say arse, fudge and all those softened curse words, they are actually saying the curse words, not say arse or fudge. I just didn't want it to be censored to make it more confusing... o-o

That's another wrap up people! Good job everyone! Especially you Kakashi! I'm sure you need some ice for that bump on your head!

Thanks for reading my chapter! No need to review! I hope you look forward to another chapter!

P.S. If you have some suggestions or spotted some errors, please tell. I hate having errors and suggestions would be most welcomed!

-twirls away-


	3. Chapter 2: Bow down to Lord Voldemort!

Good morning/afternoon/evening everyone! Here is another installment of The Tale of the Enigma! Please enjoy and if you have any criticism do tell in a review, but do not flame for I will backlash at you twice as hard.

**Warnings:** Definite Yaoi : Definite Yaoi : Mentions Crossdressing : Appearance Changes : OOCness : Shounen-Ai

**Again:** The romantic pairing for Naruto will NOT be with Kakashi, he will be with someone else. Kakashi and Naruto will have a mentor/student relationship and maybe even further to a family relationship. But they will not be romantically involved with each other!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto if I did, Sai would have his own theme song, Shikamaru would be making-out with Naruto and Kakashi would explain why his hair is gray.

**I have a pet manatee named Mana** = Kyuubi talking to Naruto

_I have a pet manatee named Mana _= Anyone's Thoughts

"I have a pet manatee named Mana." = Talking aloud

* * *

"_It's almost unbearable, isn't it... the pain of being all alone. I know that feeling, I've been there, in that dark and lonely place, but now there are others, other people who mean a lot to me. I care more about them than I do myself, and I won't let anyone hurt them." -Naruto to Gaara (Canon)_

_

* * *

_

**Konoha Forests**

**Outside of Konoha**

"Draco Malfoy in position, over. Naruto what the fudge is this name?"

"Ginny Weasley in position over. What the heck is a Weasley?"

"Sirius Black in position over. Next time I'm thinking of the codenames."

"Lord Voldemort in position over, target in sight. Why don't you guys like the names I chose out for you?"

"Discussing this later, attack now!"

A hiss was heard and an extremely loud screech "OW!" Then a "poor kitty, Draco will always have a stick up his ass," and purring was heard next.

* * *

**Ji-chan's Tower**

Four figures were seen walking towards the Hokage's office. By the look on each of their faces minus two, you don't to get on their nerves right now.

Sasuke of the mighty Uchiha clan was glaring at the cat. _No not a cat, more of the Shinigami's incarnate. How that devil survives for so long I'll never know and will always hope to change to that. Mwa ha ha ha ha._

Sakura was thinking along the same lines well, most of it anyways. _Argh! My hair got all messed up because of that stupid cat! I know I shouldn't worry so much about my hair, but you know what they say, a women's life is her hair. Hmph. Must find a way to murder it._

All the while Naruto was seen holding said cat as he continued to pet and coo at it.

"Who's such a cute cat? You are, yes you are!"

The cat merrily purred as she felt euphoric. _Oh Kami-sama! Thank you for blessing me with this angel! That's it right under my ears, ahhhhh~_

Kakashi opened the door as seeing two of his students were too irritated and annoyed to actually open and the other had his hands full. He sighed, _this team is by far the most unique I have ever encountered… Aside from Gai's and the Sanin. _

"Ji-chan! We're here with Tora-chan! She's adorable right?" Naruto shoved Tora into the Hokage's face. The Hokage could swear he saw that cat scowl at him. _How the heck does this cat survive?_

"Uh yes, very adorable," he cautiously answered, eyeing the cat in case it attacked him.

"Oh my Tora-chan! Mama's missed you so much!" A rather pudgy woman scooped Tora from Naruto and started to smother her chubby cheeks. _Nooo! Put me back into the angel's arms! _

"Excuse me Madam Shijimi, I suggest you hold Tora-chan gentler, like this," Naruto showed the fire daimyo's wife the way he has been holding Tora-chan, "And if you scratch her behind her left ear, she'll melt into goo."

Madam Shijimi, doing what she was told instead of scolding the man, marveled when her Tora-chan melted into her arms and didn't even try to run away.

"Why thank you young lady! I'll pay you extra just for that tip! Maybe now Tora-chan won't to run away anymore!" With that she left the office.

Sasuke and Sakura snickered when the daimyo's wife called Naruto a lady.

"Maybe I should try to become more masculine… Nah, I wouldn't get semes like that," Naruto contemplated.

**Of course, my kit will only get the best. Though there are some delicious males here.**

Naruto could practically see Kyuubi wiggle his nonexistent eyebrows.

_The best huh? But you are so right Yu-chan! There are some sexy delicious looking males here! Like…_

All the occupants sweatdropped when they saw drool come out of Naruto's mouth.

"Okay, you can choose your next mission now. You can weed Mrs. Lulufer's garden, paint Mr. Rurufer's house or you can find Mrs. Fufufer's pet worm," the Sandaime listed.

**Who the fudge actually keeps a pet worm? **

_Mrs. Fufufer apparently, ooh I hope it doesn't get eaten by a nargle._

**Okay… what the fudge is a nargle?**

_A hee hee hee…I don't know actually._

**Wel-**

A bang was heard and all the occupants looked at the culprit to find him to be no other than,

"Sakura, is there a problem?" the Sandaime questioned.

"I will not do these, these, petty civilian work! These wouldn't even be considered a D-rank mission! Heck even kids still going in the Academy can finish these! Give us a dang C-rank mission!" Sakura ranted while glaring at her superior.

"Sakura! I-" Iruka was about to lecture but was stopped by the Hokage.

"Alright, I'll assign you a C-rank mission. Please come in Tazuna-san."

"It's 'bout time you let me in you ol' geezer," a grumpy yet slightly tipsy voice gruffly replied.

In stepped in an old man with graying hair who was exceptionally tanned. The others spotted a slight blush under his glasses and looked to the sake bottle in his right hand.

"You got to be kiddin' me. You're sayin' these runts will actually protect me? An emo brooder, a walking wad of bubble gum and a… what gender are you blondie?"

** Ha ha ha! Again! Another person who couldn't decipher your gender! You might as well tattoo 'Male' on your forehead! Ha ha ha!**

Naruto mentally punched the almighty Kyuubi on the head and knocked him out.

"I am a male!" Naruto sang and mock bowed.

"Great, and a crossdresser who's confused about his gender."

Sakura and Sasuke who looked ready to murder the poor man while being held back by Kakashi, couldn't help but let out a few laughs at Tazuna's comment.

The Hokage sighed, "I assure you Tazuna-san, these Genins are the best of the village. You are more than protected and you do have a Jounin to go with you.

Tazuna hmphed and exited the building.

"Tazuna-san is a master bridge-builder and is currently being targeted by assassins set to prevent Tazuna from completing the bridge between the Land of Waves and the mainland. You are to escort him safely back home and see to it he finishes the bridge," the Sandaime explained.

"Stupid muggle, you dare try to order me! No one orders Lord Voldemort what to do!" Naruto suddenly stood and pointed a finger at the Sandaime with a half-hearted glare.

"Okay, let us _muggles_ meet at the gate at 12 o' clock, pack your belongings for a 1 month stay. Who knows how long we'll stay there?" Kakashi poofed while the others left the normal way. Except for Naruto, he simply stayed and waited until the others left.

"Hokage-sama, can you please tell me why we were assigned to an A-rank mission instead of a C-rank as you had stated?" Naruto sat down in the chair that was positioned in front of the Hokage and blankly stared at the Hokage. His usual smile not in place, instead there was a thin line.

Said Hokage sighed for what seemed the 100th time that day, "I knew you would notice anything suspicious in the mission Naruto. The Land of Waves is economically broken, poverty is everywhere you see, all because of one villain, Gatō. I want you and Kakashi to see to it that they finish the bridge and no casualties happen to Tazuna. I trust your skills Naruto and not just your ninja skills."

**You should just go along with it Kit, who knows? You may find some entertainment in it.**

Naruto smiled a little and sighed, "I'll do it, only because Kyuubi suggested it. I do hope you know what you're doing Hokage-sama. You're risking the lives of two innocent Genins here." Naruto jumped out of the window with one glance back.

"You would've been one of those innocent Genins if it wasn't for me Naruto," Sarutobi mournfully whispered.

**The Nargles didn't just steal your childhood, kit.**

_No they didn't. But you can't steal what someone doesn't have._

_

* * *

_

**Konoha Gates**

**12 o' Clock**

"Neh Ta-kun, have you ever seen a Crumple-Horned Snorkack? Huh? So have you? Have you ever seen a Crumple-Horned Snorkack?" Naruto continuously poked Tazuna while repeated the same question over and over again.

Tazuna on the other hand was actually sober, but was slowly getting more and more annoyed. _Just wait until we arrive at my house, sake all day long! Heavenly sake._

Naruto stopped poking Tazuna to greet Sakura and Sasuke who just arrived.

"Hi Sasuke! Hi Sakura!" Naruto jumped up and down after giving a quick kiss to Sakura's cheek and a hug to Sasuke.

"You have one weird-ass teammate," Tazuna whispered to Sasuke and Sakura.

"I heard that Tazuna," Naruto whispered to the trio.

Tazuna jumped and glared at Naruto while Naruto giggled.

**One day, someone's going to stab you if you whisper to them like that unexpectedly.**

_One day, I'm going to amputate that person before he actually succeeds._

**Bwa ha ha ha ha! I taught you well, still need to teach you more.**

_Disgusting half-blood! You dare criticize you Lord? I am Lord Voldemort and you will bow down to me!_

**Oh shut your lipless mouth oh mighty one. Remember Lord Voldemort was a half-blood too. Talk about hypocritical much, hmph.**

_Don't make me do a Crucio on you mortal fool._

**… You dare call me a mortal you dam slit-faced bald-ass imbecile! Why I oughta-**

And so Naruto tuned the greatly feared Kyuubi out and actually sighed at his antics.

_Maybe I shouldn't have taken the acting too far, oh well! Harry Potter fanfictions are very sexy. I so love Harry as the uke, so cute!_

"Your friend is also bi-polar too," Tazuna said without even bothering to lower his voice.

"I think you're going to be split in two soon too," Naruto threatened while he smiled Kakashi's curved-eye smile. Though the image was ruined by the very sharp dagger that was a little too close to Tazuna's neck to his liking.

"You know, you're kind of insane."

"It's all in a day's work, exhausting should I add."

"I see…" _Not really._

Kakashi had impeccable timing and poofed in to witness the scene that was before him. Sasuke and Sakura were like statues and were blankly looking at the duo which contained of Naruto and their client, who currently was being in danger of disappearing.

"Maa, maa Naruto, relax and you can have this strange food I was just introduced to. I think it was called blooberbeer? No that's wrong… buttbeer? That sounds more wrong, oh yea! Butterbeer!" And Kakashi took out a beer mug full of the wonderful essence the Harry Potter books have described.

Before Kakashi could even attempt to give the butterbeer to Naruto, he was already down before he noticed his hands were free and Naruto was chugging down the contents of the object his hands were supposed to be hold.

And then Naruto spit it all out.

"Bleh disgusting! This isn't even water or some kind of sugary liquid! It's like mud mixed with hard candies that aren't even melted!" Naruto yelled and glared maliciously at his sensei.

"Explain."

"I don't know what I'm to say Naru-chan. A stranger going by the name of Tom Riddle told me to give this to you along with this note," Kakashi quickly explained and handed Naruto a small parchment.

Naruto glared at Kakashi, snatched the parchment out of his hand and started to read it.

_Dear Wizard-Wannabe,_

_ Freaking stop trying to impersonate my other self! It's very angering to know that someone else is trying to imitate my great beingness and is failing at it! And you continue to make a mockery out of my name too! Karma will get you back muggle, Karma will get you back._

_ With lots of hate and pain,_

_ Your Superior:_

_ Lord Voldemort_

**One comment, Harry Potter is real? What the fudge! You saying that there are actual mortals who wear dresses that swish a useless piece of wood while saying "Floobenburg" and expect an object to blow up or float?**

_What? You never knew? You thought I was joking about that? Right now there are people who are watching us, making our every move._

**… You're creeping me out.**

_Don't you feel the eyes?_

"Anyways, moving on! Let's set off, I hope you little nuggets are ready for your first adventure in another village!" Kakashi happily cheered and started to walk down the path. The others followed with Naruto skipping next to Kakashi.

"Kaka-sensei, someone is going to die on this mission. Whether you try to prevent it or initiate it, someone will die. Who knows though, that same person could be revived," Naruto whispered as he skipped by him.

Kakashi's visible eye narrowed. _Is he saying he will kill someone? Or does he know who were versing against? _

The walk had continued on without any disturbance, until they passed a harmless-looking puddle.

**Fools, not even noticing that there hasn't been any rain since two weeks ago.**

_They're still learning, give them a break Kyuubi, but you're right. If they don't actually utilize the skills they learned in the Academy, they're going to be easy targets._

Abruptly, two grown men appeared out of the puddle, ambushed the small group and shredded Kakashi into ripped pieces. Sakura screamed while Naruto and Sasuke surrounded Tazuna.

"Fresh meat," one of the assassins said.

"Very weak-looking might I say though brother," the other had said.

Sasuke ran towards the duo and started to fight against one of them.

The other brother was about to attack Sasuke, but was stopped by Naruto.

Meizu turned around and saw something that made tremble, his captor had a crazed grin on his face with his eyes as cold as ice. They showed promised death and no mercy. Before Meizu could react, Naruto had slashed his captive across the neck, the blood soaking Naruto all over his body and dagger.

Naruto ch'ed and licked the blood of the dagger.

"Weak, boring, bland, plain, shouldn't exist anymore," Naruto chanted and threw the corpse to the ground. Tazuna threw up in front of him while Sakura looked deathly pale.

** Such a weak opponent, no fun at all. This ****Gatō**** better have more worthy opponents or he will die a very painful death.**

Meanwhile Sasuke had successfully chained Gōzu against a tree, but he had several scratches here and there.

"Good job, good job everyone." Kakashi clapped and appeared out of the trees.

"Kakashi-sensei, you're alive!" Sakura screamed.

"Yes I'm alive, good job Sasuke for capturing one of the assassins, good job Naruto for taking out the other. We wouldn't need the other brother anyways," Kakashi complimented nonchalantly.

"Kakashi-sensei, Naruto killed one of the ninja! He killed one of them!" Sakura all but screamed. She was confused as to why Kakashi would be so… so indifferent to a killing.

"You're in the Ninja World now you stupid imbecile. If you can't get around the fact that Ninjas are hired to kill or capture, then you should resign as a Genin right now. You will do more killings in the future and more people will try to kill you in return. It's to kill or be killed out here. So suck it up or go back to your mommy," Naruto growled.

Sakura gasped, _I know I would have to kill one day, but I never thought I would see someone actually killing another person so heartlessly. _

Sasuke nodded in agreement, but he was a little paler than usual (a feat!), _the way he killed, it was like the way __**he**__ killed. So heartlessly and mercilessly. No emotions at all._

"Sakura, Naruto is right. One day you will have your first kill, and it's always the first kill that's hardest to get over, but soon you'll be able to kill without any remorse whatsoever. When you signed up to become a Ninja, you signed up to kill for money and to protect your home," Kakashi said.

Sakura mutely nodded. Tazuna eyed Naruto very cautiously after recovering from throwing up, _what kind of life did this kid have to go through to be able to kill without any hesitation at all? I have to be careful I don't want to get on his bad side._

_ Naruto, this should've been your first kill, but the skill you showed doesn't indicate it was. How many times did you have to kill before? At what age did you had your first kill? _Kakashi asked Naruto in his mind knowing Naruto wouldn't hear his thoughts at all.

"Let's keep moving! I can't wait to see the bridge!" Naruto exclaimed with his child persona back and started to skip ahead of them.

"Crazy, he's psychotic. What kind of kids do you raise in Konoha?" Tazuna muttered while walking next to Kakashi.

"Let's just say Naruto didn't have a life most kids should've had," Kakashi sadly answered. Not knowing that Sasuke and Sakura had heard this as well and were surprised how Kakashi sounded so… so guilty.

"We will discuss why there were Chunin-leveled assassins hired to kill a simple bridge-builder during the boat ride." Kakashi narrowed his eyes at Tazuna. _Endangering my team will you and lying while you're at it huh? _

"Oi! You slowpokes! Hurry up you sniveling no-good-waste-of-space! Muggles! Such lower beings!" Naruto mocked demanded and stomped his foot.

The others hurried, one just to amuse Naruto, the other afraid of what Naruto would do if he disobeyed, and the other two didn't want to get left behind.

_What have we gotten into?_

_

* * *

_

And so that's the end. I'm sorry it's not as long as the others, but I've been working on my project and practicing my bassoon so I had little time to actually work on this chapter, but the next will be longer! I know nothing much happened in this chapter except maybe a showing of Naruto's more malicious personality, but I don't want to rush it so much. Okay, so I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter and please look forward to the next updation! I love all the reviews, favorites and alerts I've been seeing in my email! It makes me feel so happy and proud of this story even though so far I'm not satisfied with it. But I must work harder to satisfy me then! -bows- Thank you for reading! Again, you do not have to review if you do not want to!


	4. Chapter 3: You reap what you sow

Well here it is guys! Thanks for the patience! I'm truly sorry for not providing this update any sooner. I would say that I am busy, but I certainly had the time to do the chapter little by little everyday. Thing is, I like writing a whole chapter in one day, then revising in another day.

**Thank you:** Wow, you people are too kind you know that? When I put my poll up I was just expecting 10 votes at most but then when I checked it was 34 votes! You guys are so loving! T T Makes me feel sad that I gave you such a late updation. So the majority wants Zabuza and Haku to know Naruto, live and then go to Konoha! So you wish it, so shall it be.

**Warnings:** Definite Yaoi : Mentions Crossdressing : Appearance Changes : OOCness : Shounen-Ai

**Reminder:** Last reminder too. Again, this is not a Kakashi and Naruto pairing concerning romance. It may change to a close relationship of family or friendship, but never a romantic pairing.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto. If I did… well I would have to get to my fortress to hide from all of those homophobic asses.

This chapter will not have as much humor as it had in the other chapters. It will be a little more serious.

**Puri **= Kyuubi talking to Naruto

_Puri = _Anyone's thoughts

"Puri." = Talking aloud

Just for this chapter only: _**"Puri."**_ = Memory (Only words, no pictures)

* * *

_"I realized the most painful thing, that in this world, __my existence was not needed__" -Haku to Naruto _

* * *

"Now Tazuna, can you explain to us now why there were two Chunin-level ninjas hired to go after you? Normally a C-rank mission doesn't entail assassins to be hired," Kakashi questioned with a stern glare.

The five were in a motorboat owned and currently directed by Kaji to the Land of Waves.

"And don't go spouting nonsense. I will abandon this mission if you don't give an adequate explanation. We were hired for a C-rank mission, not a high B-rank mission."

Tazuna's eyes widened, but then his facial expression turned sullen.

"The Land of Waves is not as it used to be anymore. Ever since Gatō, an extremely wealthy marine transporter, came, our country has been struggling economically. Gatō hires gangs and ninjas to smuggle in drugs and other contraband goods and takes over other companies and countries. Then one year ago, Gatō came and he used violence and wealth as his shield and he quickly took over the island's sea traffic and transportation. On this island, controlling the sea means ruling over the wealth, politics and peoples of the island. But the one thing Gatō is afraid of is the completion of the bridge that has been under construction for quite some time."

"I see, so as you being the one building the bridge, you're seen as one of his obstacles," Sakura inquired.

"Those ninjas were sent by Gatō then," Sasuke added in.

"Now we know that Gatō is a dangerous man, but that doesn't explain why you had to lie to us," Kakashi said.

"The Land of Waves is a poor country; even the feudal lord doesn't have much money. And neither can we afford a mission ranked B or above. If you leave now, I'll be killed for sure as I walk back home, but do not blame yourselves for my death. Only my cute eight-year old grandson will cry and cry for me. Let's not forget that my daughter will hold a grudge against Konoha ninjas and live a lonesome life with her son," Tazuna grinned.

"Well if you put it like that Tazuna-san…" Sakura softly replied.

"It can't be helped then Tazuna. We'll just have to see through this mission then," Kakashi happily said.

"That's good to hear." _I won._

"Pathetic. You lot are all pathetic."

The occupants turned to stare at the culprit, Naruto.

_Now that I think about it, he hasn't said anything the whole ride, _Kakashi realized.

"What do you mean by that Naruto? Don't you feel sorry for the people of the Wave?" Sakura fiercely said while trying to keep it down. Even Sasuke stared in shock.

"We're supposed to be ninjas. As you continue to get deeper in the world of ninjas, you'll see all kinds of unfortunate times, but we can't aid in every one of them no matter how bad it may be. We can't continue to feel sympathy for another person. Ninjas are supposed to do their job with no unnecessary emotions tagged with it. If you can't see that and if you think that it's your job to help every unfortunate person, you should quit being a ninja," a monotone drone drawled, almost bored.

"Naruto, sometimes emotions are needed for a mission to be completed. Yes you're right Naruto, ninjas can't aid every singly unlucky person they meet, but if the mission is to save a country from poverty then we could aid every single person in that country," Kakashi responded as his two students thought over the words he and Naruto said.

Naruto didn't answer and instead murmured, "We're here."

**You know what he says is true Kit. Though some emotions are best left out, some are best left alone.**

_Sometimes I wonder though, do I really want to feel these emotions?_

**Ki-**

"Good luck Tazuna," Kaji said and he rowed away.

* * *

**On the way to Tazuna's House**

_**"Who are you?"**_

The group of five was peacefully walking down the path towards Tazuna's house.

Suddenly Sasuke threw a kunai at a nearby tree. Team 7 went into a defense position while Naruto walked casually towards the tree Sasuke threw the kunai at. He bent down and picked up a white rabbit, scared and trembling.

"Sasuke-kun, you scared the poor rabbit," Sakura scolded and put her kunai away.

_A white rabbit, in the middle of spring? That doesn't make sense, unless it was kept indoors…_

Just then Kakashi heard the unmistakable sound of a blade whirring towards them.

"Everyone, DUCK!" Kakashi shouted and pulled Tazuna down with him.

Not a second later an enormous blade came rushing towards them and stuck itself into a tree, missing all of its targets. The culprit appeared on the hilt of sword.

**Kit! It's him! Ooh, look at those muscles!**

_Who?_ Naruto took a closer look at the stranger while stroking the rabbit, who was even more scared. His eyes widened not with fear, but with warmth and surprise.

"Oh my! You're Momochi Zabuza, the exiled ninja of the Hidden Village of Mis-" Kakashi was interrupted by a blur of yellow rushing towards Zabuza. He was too late to react. "Naruto!"

_**"A kindred soul, I've been watching you two for a very long time."**_

"Usagi-chan!" Naruto squealed and hugged Zabuza.

Zabuza AKA Usagi-chan, was a tall and muscular man with an intimidating aura surrounding him. He had pale skin accompanied with short, black, spiked hair. He was wearing his forehead protector sideways on his head, it looked as though it was keeping his hair out of his cold brown eyes. He was wearing bandages like a mask over the bottom half of his face. Far from a normal looking usagi, no hint of resemblance at all actually.

Though that wasn't what Naruto was looking at. No, he was in fact drooling at Zabuza's outfit. He was bare-chested, only covered by a belt to which he attached his Kubikiribōchō (his gigantic sword…hehe), while wearing baggy pants with the striped pattern typical of Kirigakure and mimetic wrist-warmers extending up to his elbows, with matching leg-warmers.

_**"I'm not your savior nor am I your tormentor."**_

"Naruto's glad you're here. Does that mean Ha-chan is here too?"

Naruto excitedly looked around, but he already knew where "Ha-chan" was located.

The rest of Team 7 and Tazuna gulped when they saw one of Zabuza's small eyebrow twitches.

"How many times have I told you not to call me that, Foxy?" Zabuza said, as he laid an arm around Naruto's shoulders. It almost looked like a hug to the onlookers.

"1,289 times and still counting!"

"You shouldn't disturb Zabuza-sama so much Naruto-kun. I'm afraid one day he will actually start to adopt some traits of a rabbit," a figure gently teased as they jumped out of a tree.

The figure had a slender frame and was quite short. They were wearing a moss green, striped turtle-neck sweater and a split skirt in matching color that reached down to his knees. On the outside of that, they wore a green blue short kimono with white edges, and around his waist a green brown obi, in the same fabric as his sweater, with a fringed trail. The stranger's black shoulder length hair was gathered in a white bun holder, while two locks of their hair fell loose framing their face, that were bound with metal hair cuffs at the ends. To finish it off they wore a white mask with thin, curved eye-holes and a red wavy design in place of the mouth, as well as the Kirigakure symbol on the forehead.

"Ha-chan!" Naruto exclaimed and hugged (tackled) them.

"Hello Naruto-kun. It's been a very long time since we've seen each other."

_**"Wait! When we'll we see you again?"**_

"Yes, where or where has my favorite toy been?" Zabuza grinned, showing off his sharp teeth, and hugged Naruto towards his body.

Naruto giggled and had a dazed look on his face as he started at those bulging muscles.

**Damn, no matter how many time I see those muscles, I still drool.**

_I agree._

**Do you- **

A small cough interrupted Naruto's and his special friend's daydreaming and all eyes went on,

"Yes Kaka-sensei?"

"Do you want to introduce us to your friends?"

"I don't know, do I?" Naruto tilted his head and looked up at his Usagi-chan to see a nod.

"Okay, if Usagi-chan wants me to, I'll do it!"

Naruto walked from Zabuza's hold and stood in the middle between his team (and Tazuna) and Zabuza with Ha-chan.

_**"When fate deems it right. Remember, a tool can also be a friend. While a friend can also be a tool."**_

Naruto sighed.

**Get on with it Kit. The faster you're done with the intros the longer you can look at those muscles. And don't get me started on that grin! Woot look at those teeth. I wish I had those… **

Naruto could practically see Kyuubi skulking in the corner of the cage. How he could fit his huge body in that small corner, is a mystery to Naruto.

"This is my team from Konoha. The man with the gray hair is my sensei, Hatake Kakashi, but you already knew that. The bubblegum hair-ed girl is one of my teammates, Haruno Sakura. And this semi-depressing boy is my other teammate, Uchiha Sasuke. Oh and the drunkard there is Tazuna, the person you're hired to kill I'm guessing," Naruto offhandedly said as he pointed to each person respectively to their names.

"Anyways, this beautiful (though they couldn't see it behind the mask) person is my Ha-chan, or Haku. And this hulk of a man is Momochi Zabuza," Naruto introduced with hearts in his eyes as he finished.

**And what a hulk he is.**

_And what an eye candy he is._

**And what a piece of meat he is.**

_And what a sex god he is._

**And what a-**

Naruto once again tuned Kyuubi out before it became an all out match of sexual labeling. (A/N: Trust me, those go on forever…because I'm perverted like that! :D)

"Why are you here anyways?" Naruto was curious as to why his companions were here.

_**"You could say we're companions."**_

"We were hired to kill Tazuna over there, but if you're hired to protect him, then I'll guess we don't need the money that much," Zabuza replied with a bored tone.

"Good, now you three can escort Tazuna here to his house. I'm going to go with Usagi-chan and Ha-chan to their hideout," Naruto instructed and poofed away along with his companions.

"To have some fun," Kakashi heard Naruto giggle.

* * *

**At Usagi-chan's Hideout **

A poof was heard and three figures appeared in the middle of the scarcely decorated room.

"Wow, I think you do need the money. I mean even if it's a hideout, you should at least make it at least a little more homely." Naruto tsked and sat on one of the two beds.

"Whatever, Haku, you can go shopping now. You said you wanted to go shop for some new fabric and nail polish. Why I let you buy that I would never know," Zabuza said.

_**"What are you doing?"**_

_** "I'm painting Ha-chan's nails. What else does it look like I'm doing?"**_

"Hai hai Zabuza-sama," Haku mocked and lazily walked out of the hideout in his casual outfit. He had his long hair loose and wore a pink sleeveless, low-cut kimono, with pale red edges and decorated with small plum-colored swirls that went to his ankles. Around his waist was a simple white obi tied in a bow, and he wore a pair of light brown sandals with dark straps. To add to his feminine appearance, he wore a dark choker around his neck.

"Ha-chan! Don't let those horny boys get near you!" Naruto yelled after Haku just before the door was shut.

Haku shook his head at Naruto's antics as he walked towards the village.

"So Usagi-chan, how was traveling without your favorite toy?" Naruto asked teasingly.

"It was very straining when you hear Haku constantly complaining about how he had no one to talk about with boys, nails, hair and all that stuff you gay ukes do."

Naruto laughed, not giggle, but laughed as he heard that.

"We missed you," Zabuza said after a moment.

Naruto stopped laughing as he stared at Zabuza, who stared right back.

"I missed you both too."

Naruto hugged Zabuza and snuggled in the warmth.

_** "I've never been hugged before."**_

"I felt very cold without you both near me. Kyuubi kept me company though, and it helped a lot."

**Of course, who do you think I am? **

_A duck._

**Wha-**

Naruto tuned him out before he started ranting again.

"Sometimes I wish I could just continue to travel with you and Haku forever until we die. But then I remember Konoha and…" Naruto couldn't finish the sentence.

He never knew to this day what he felt towards his birth village. He knew he felt hate, of course he did, but he also felt… something. He didn't know what it was, but he knew it was what was keeping him from destroying the village. It wasn't love, it wasn't affection, and it would never be loyalty, so what was it?

**You're thinking about the wrong part of Konoha. You're thinking about the village itself, Kit.**

Naruto was startled from his thoughts when a hand caressed his cheek. He leant into the soft touch.

"When do you think is the best time to beat the shit out of this Gatō? I don't know why you didn't just beat him up and take all of his money," Naruto said.

"Now where would be the fun in that? I say me and Haku just betray him when he backstabs us. I know he wasn't gonna pay us from the start," Zabuza smirked at Naruto.

Naruto grinned deviously in return and pounced on his Usagi-chan.

"Now, what did I say about fun?"

_**"Neh, have you ever lived?"**_

* * *

**Back with Team 7 and the Drunk**

_I don't know if I should be relieved or worried that Naruto knows Zabuza. _Kakashi thought as he walked along his client and two students.

_How does he know Zabuza is the question here. He shouldn't be able to know anyone outside of the village. Was the Anbu slacking off on their duties? I never saw Naruto leave the village when I was on duty. Were we just tricked? So many questions, not enough answers at all. No puzzle pieces that fit each other. _

As Kakashi wondered about this mystery, his other little students too wondered about their mysterious teammate.

_I never thought Naruto would know such a dangerous person! I wonder if Naruto knows anyone else outside of the village aside from those two. _Sakura pondered as she unconsciously twirled a piece of her hair. _Sakura, you have to remember that Naruto isn't the person you thought he was! _She mentally scolded herself.

_Uzumaki Naruto. Who are you? How come you're so different than what everyone else believed? How did you get so much power? The power to defeat __**him**__… _Sasuke's pace started to slow down a little as his thoughts became more dark.

"Foolish little brother, if you wish to kill me, hate me, detest me. And yet survive in an unsightly way. Run, run and cling to life, and when you have the same eyes as mine, come to me.(1)" The words **he** said him echoed throughout his mind.

_I need that power. I need to know where he got it! _Blood trailed down Sasuke's hands as his nails embedded themselves into the palm of his hands.

Tazuna broke his protectors' thoughts as he announced that they arrived to their destination, his home.

As they entered the inn, they were greeted by his daughter, Tsunami.

"Welcome! Oh! You brought ninjas with you, good!"

"This is my beautiful daughter, Tsunami. Tsunami this is Kakashi, the sensei of the squad. The girl is Sakura and the boy is Sasuke. There is another teammate but he disappeared off to who knows where, his name is Naruto," Tazuna introduced.

"Hello! Thank you for protecting this drunk of a father! I appreciate it greatly!" Tsunami bowed in gratefulness.

Kakashi chuckled, "Can you please show us our rooms?"

"Of course, please follow me."

_**"They say home is where the heart is. But what if you won't have a heart?"**_

* * *

**Back to the Naughty Pair -wiggles eyebrows-**

Naruto was draped over Zabuza's chest as Zabuza gently caressed his back.

"So what did you do when I went back to Konoha?" Naruto softly questioned.

"Well, after you left, me and Haku set off to find some jobs for some money," Zabuza lazily answered.

"So nothing fun happened I guess?"

"Nope. Nothing exciting happened to us. No close encounters to death or big mobs to kill."

"Don't worry my Usagi-chan, now that your Chibi Kitsune is here, all disasters shall reap on us!" Naruto glomped his life-sized teddy bear and purred.

"I don't know if I should be excited or worried."

"You should feel grateful that you have such a wondrous being in your presence!"

Zabuza chuckled and continued to caress Naruto on the back. A comfortable silence descended on the two.

"So you want to keep the act up with Gatō and pretend you're all ready to kill us little Genins or do you just want to hang out with your favorite person in the whole wide world?"

**And you wonder why some people think you two are an item.**

_Yu-chan! Where have you been? _

**… Where would I've been you no good fu-**

"Yu-chan is constantly going on a rant today. Maybe he's frustrated with all the no-sex life."

Zabuza sweatdropped, moved Naruto to his side, and sat upright.

"I think me and Haku will just hang out with you're little groupie," Zabuza decided.

Naruto cheered and started to drag his companion out the door.

"I'm sure you don't have anything good in this pitiful place so we'll just leave. I already put down a note to tell Haku where to find us so he doesn't think we ran without him again."

_Kyuubi, you done ranting?_

**-and then when I'm done castrating you I'm gonna-**

_Never mind._

Naruto jumped onto one of the trees, turned around and gave a suggestive wink.

"Come and catch me you big bad wolf." And started to jump away, towards what he assumed was Tazuna's house.

"Oh you naughty little fox."

_**"Don't you love the thrill of death?"**_

* * *

**To Kaka-sensei and his long, long contemplation!**

Kakashi was seen in his room with files scattered all around him. He told Sakura and Sasuke to take a short rest to recover some energy. He needed to research about his mysterious student.

He was currently looking through the file the academy recorded about Naruto.

_It says Naruto had no talent whatsoever at Genjutsu and Ninjutsu. All of his attempts at any of the jutsus or dispelling a Genjutsu ended up in failure. That doesn't make sense, from what I got when I fought Naruto, he was more than proficient enough at Ninjutsu. I still don't know about Genjutsu though, but if he has that much control over his chakra, I'm sure he'll have no problem at Genjutsu, much less dispelling it. _

As Kakashi continued to read through the files, he noticed a pattern, none of the evaluators were Iruka, and sounded very much bias to Naruto. Kakashi knew that Iruka was the only instructor at the academy who judged fairly and knew Naruto wasn't the Kyuubi.

_Naruto's taijutsu is commendable really. Even if I was not in my best state, he still was better than the average Genin. He could even be better a Chunin! These files are utter crap and don't give me any information at all. They say the exact opposite of Naruto's skills. It disgusts me how stupid and biased these instructors are. I wouldn't want my child to be even near these leeches, considering if I ever settle down._

Kakashi threw the file in the pile where other useless and rejected files were.

He picked up the thickest file, it was personally written by the Hokage himself. He took out a group of papers at random and started to read.

_"April 26 (2), Age 6. Naruto is a very curious child. He questions everything, and thinks about so many different things at different intervals that it's a hard job trying to keep up with him. What I noticed though was that he was most interested in Fuinjutsu and Ninjutsu pertaining to the healing element. So I gave into his pleadings and gave him some scrolls on both subjects in the beginner level. I taught him how to read and write as the instructors refused to teach him. I fired them and hired new ones, but the results were the same. It worries me on how all of these negative emotions towards him will affect Naruto's nature."_

_"March 1, Age 6. Naruto always have surprises in store for me. It seems that Naruto read through all the scrolls I gave him and showed me that aside from book knowledge, he can actually do the most basic healing jutsu and basic seals. At such a young age, he absorbs information much faster than the grown-men I have encountered! He is a like a sponge where he stores all of the information into a black hole. His curiousity is never sated, in fact, I'm sure that it just increases the more he's introduced to something! Naruto seems to have also made his own training regime for taijutsu. I can see the results already. It seems Naruto is aiming for a lithe build, for agility. He's using weights and with the seals he learned, made a seal that added weight to his arm! I gave him more beginner scrolls along with a few of intermediate scrolls. I was admittedly excited for what Naruto will think of next. Hopefully this will take him longer to learn."_

_ Interesting, it seems Naruto showed more enthusiasm to learning when he was younger. Iruka always said Naruto fell asleep during his classes, no matter what they were learning. Maybe Naruto needs to be introduced to something he has genuine interest in it or what he decides is worth the effort. _

Kakashi continued to read.

_"March 10, Age 6. Although it took a longer time than it did to read the previous scrolls, Naruto still read at a faster pace and was able to do utilize them outside of books and papers. Naruto expressed that the healing Ninjutsus and the Fuinjutsu were very interesting to him, and that he couldn't wait to learn more about those two branches. He showed much creativity in those two subjects. For example, he wrote seals on a pair of pants with his blood and it let him put more items in it than the normal pocket. Why Fuinjutsu masters only applied seals on scrolls was a mystery to Naruto and now me too. Healing jutsu on the other hand made him do an experiment with a injured fish. He concluded that by applying more chakra with an even more controlled grip, it would help the healing process go faster. It was a success, but because most medic-nin did not have a huge chakra reserve (hence the reason why they have such good control in the first place), they could not do what Naruto did."_

_Amazing! To think that only a six year old came up with these ideas. Naruto knows more then he lets on. I wonder why the Hokage didn't appoint him as a __Tokubetsu__ Jounin for Fuinjutsu or as a Medic-nin, figuring that Naruto would further research about the two branches._

Kakashi skimmed through the papers, noting how Naruto also took interest in Kekkai Genkai, poisons, and interrogation techniques.

He stopped though when he saw a few words that made his blood stop cold, _"Betrayed...Blood massacre…didn't know what happened…empty and dull…wouldn't talk…different…trust…"_

_"October 10, Age 8. The Anbu I entrusted the safety of Naruto to betrayed me and let a mob free reign over Naruto. There were ninjas of all ranks and civilians that had joined in the attack. When the Anbu squad and I arrived on the scene, it was a plain blood massacre. There were corpses every where, most had their eyes opened in wide terror. Of what I don't know, but whatever it was, it was powerful and had left a pure stench of bloodlust in the air. There were claw marks on some corpses, burnt bodies here and there, body parts strewn all over. I didn't know what happened, or what could have made this horrible scene, but I was sure I didn't want to know. When I walked over to Naruto, his eyes, they were empty and dull, like the fire in them was extinguished. I asked him what happened, but he wouldn't talk. No matter how much I pleaded and asked, he wouldn't talk at all. Naruto didn't even twitch when I picked him up and it worried me greatly. After the report one of my most trusted Medic-nin gave me. I knew Naruto would be different. Much different then the ball of sunshine I knew personally. So many broken bones, bruises, loss of blood, not to mention the trauma it caused him mentally. I only hope that Naruto will still trust this old man who let him down him in the worst possible way._

The paper had tear marks at the bottom.

Kakashi was furious. How could they! How could they not see that what they scorn and ostracize is nothing but a small child? They may think that he is the Kyuubi, but now they had really done it. They gave the child a very good reason to betray this village and decimate it. Once the Hokage is gone, nothing could stop the child from destroying the village that broke his innocence (3). Kakashi knew Naruto held no love for the village. He knew the only reason why Naruto didn't leave the village yet was because of the Hokage.

Kakashi put the paper back into the file folder and put back all the files into the scroll the Hokage gave him. _At least I know more my student. I have to be careful though, any member of the village, with the exception of the Hokage, is treading on very thin ice. Very thin._

_**"They all deserved the pain. They thought I was a monster, I became the monster. You reap what you sow afterall."**_

* * *

(1) When I re-read over those words Itachi said to Sasuke in canon…I was slightly creepy out by how obsessive it sounded with a hint to a one-sided incest love… o-o But I still love you Itachi!

(2) I don't know the actual year Naruto takes place in so I just feel as though not to even include any years in this story. If any of you do know, then please say in a review or pm me!

(3) Do not worry guys, none of the attackers raped Naruto. By innocence, Kakashi meant the outlook on life most children have.

Okay End! Thank you guys so much for being so patient! I love how none of you complained that the updations were slow, thank you so much! I hate it when people complain about slow updation, some people have a life and some people have things to do. But sorry again for the late updation! T T -bows repeatedly- I hope this chapter is satisfying; I'm actually satisfied with this chapter. Again, THANK YOU ALL so much for the alerts, favorites and reviews! It means so much to me, and gives me a motivation to not discontinue this story. I had stopped at some points with frustration, thinking I should just discontinue it, but then I think about you guys and I just keep on writing! Thanks for all the support. Puri~ -bows-


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